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Most people assume self-esteem is the same as self-confidence, and although self-confidence is related, it’s not the same. Self-confident people may also suffer from low self-esteem, for example, actors, celebrities and public figures in our society today that appear to be totally self-confident may have poor self-esteem off stage or away from the media attention.
In Latin, esteem actually means ‘to estimate’, so self-esteem is often defined as how you estimate yourself. Individuals with low self-esteem usually find it difficult to answer ‘yes’ to questions such as ‘do I like myself?’, ‘do I feel I deserve to be loved?’, ‘do I think I’m a good person’ and ‘do I deserve to be happy?’.
Low self esteem is quite common in today’s society and those who accept a limited sense of self worth may be more prone to drug or alcohol abuse as they struggle to find their worth in the world. Low self-esteem may also lead to feeling depressed and hopeless, and thinking negatively about yourself and your right to happiness. However, for lots of people there is help available to change negative thinking patterns and there are many strategies and techniques available to build self esteem.
Most people experience low self esteem at some point in their life (e.g. if they lose their job or relationship) but they can also experience high self esteem at other points in their life (e.g. if they are promoted, successfully complete a challenge or fall in love). However, those who can’t bounce back after their self esteem has been bruised, and constantly feel negatively about themselves, may be suffering from chronic low self-esteem.
Common signs of low self-esteem include feeling tired alot of the time and having little motivation to get things done, feeling bored with life and feeling you don’t have much to look forward to, thinking alot about yourself and wishing your life was better, thinking negatively about your abilities and possible opportunities, feeling like a failure or feeling hopeless and depressed.
Generalisations about low self esteem include:
Therapy or counselling can often help those suffering from low self-esteem and help develop a sense of self to ensure a more fulfilling life. Some individuals may benefit from dance, music, painting or creative writing to find a sense of empowerment within themselves. Support groups on assertiveness or building self-esteem are also widely available in the UK.
Sometimes keeping a journal to explore past negative memories may help individuals relate to how these are causing them difficulties now. Taking care of your physical health, exercising, reducing stress levels and accepting a realistic challenge can also help towards building self-esteem.
Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) is a talking therapy that can help you manage your problems by changing the way you think and behave.
It is most commonly used to treat anxiety and depression, but can be useful for other mental and physical health problems.
Solution-focused brief therapy – also known as solution-focused therapy – is an approach to psychotherapy based on solution-building rather than problem-solving. Although it acknowledges present problems and past causes, it predominantly explores an individual’s current resources and future hopes – helping them to look forward and use their own strengths to achieve their goals.
Learn more about Solution-focused brief therapy
Psychotherapy involves regular personal interaction and the use of psychological methods and techniques particularly, to help change behavior and overcome problems in desired ways.
Schema Therapy helps you to understand and gain clarity of where and why difficulties have developed in life and provides a treatment plan for healing.
Learn more about Schema Therapy
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a form of psychotherapy and has been described as the fourth wave in therapy following CBT.
Applied Behaviour Analysis (ABA) is a data driven science of all behaviour.